Advice

The strangest thing happened last night at work. I got a table with two parents - probably in their early thirties - and a baby. I said hi and asked them the standard questions about their little guy: how old is he (six months) and what's his name (Carter). In an attempt to make conversation I offered up the fact that I have a little boy too, who's nine months old. The woman, who was really nice, asked his name and then asked, "does he sleep?"

A month ago, I would have instantly replied with a big ol' "heck no" and the two of us would have commiserated together over our seemingly-forever-lasting sleep deprivation. Instead, I surprised her (and myself) by saying, "yeah, actually, he does". Her and her husband exchanged glances, then stared at me. "How did you do it? We don't want to let him cry. Did Mason cry?"

I don't know, neither did I, and no, he didn't cry. I offered up all I could, explaining how one night he just seemed ready to be able to fall asleep on his own, in his own crib. It didn't happen 'til he was eight months old, but when he was ready, it hardly took any effort on our part. I explained that even though he doesn't fall asleep in our bed we bring him in when he wakes up, no matter what time of the night that might be, and he (usually) goes right back to sleep. I told them how him sleeping in our bed was (and still is) great for us and that no matter what grandma tries to tell you, your kid won't be sleeping with you 'til he goes to college.

I looked into their tired eyes and assured them that it really does get so much easier.

"You know, you're the first person to ever tell us it gets easier. Everyone's always saying it gets way worse than this". Really? Who are these negative people you've been talking to, and why are they having children?

On their way out, I said goodbye and wished them good luck with the sleeping situation. The man thanked me and said that tonight they were going to bring Carter into bed with them when he woke; he said they were going to take my advice. I was a little shocked. I mean, who in the world am I to be giving advice? I have no idea. I wanted to tell them, then, that it might not work. I never read anything about babies or did any research before Mason was born. I've been winging it this whole time. I probably have no idea what I'm talking about, so they better not get their hopes up. After all, I've only been doing this for nine months. Nine months and I just learned how to put my kid to sleep.

Last night, as Mason slept peacefully in his crib, I wondered about Carter and if he was sleeping too. Maybe bringing him into their bed worked and all three of them got eight glorious hours of sleep. Maybe he was up all night and they cursed me over their coffee in the morning. Hey, it's trial and error. We all figure it out eventually.