The Fastest Way to a Girl's Heart

is processed meat, of course.

I babysat Madelynn yesterday. When Jeff dropped her off, she cried for a good six minutes. The lunch meat was the only thing that would distract her. Sorry Aimee, but you fed my kid cupcakes.


With Mads under control, the babies ended up having a great time together.

There were a few moments, as there always is with these two, where somebody hugged somebody else too hard and they got in a little toddler arguement... but in the end, Mason won Mads over with his charm and his grilled cheese sandwiches.

Licensed

After two and a half years...

I look WAY too happy in that picture. But, really, I'm pretty excited.

It's Not What it Looks Like

It's Teeccino. Herbal naturally decafinated "coffee" made with fruit and nuts and herbs and stuff. Does it taste like coffee? Yep, pretty much. Does it have the same effects? Heck no.

Sweetheart

Oh yeah, I forgot about Valentine's Day! While I was at a spa in Michigan getting a massage, my little Valentine was home (missing his mama, I'm sure!)... so when I got home, I put his Valentine shirt on him and told him how much I loved him.

He just stuck his tongue out at me.

Day One

I'm more than halfway through my first day of cleansing. So far:

1. I need COFFEE. I had a headache most of the morning, took an hour and a half nap, and am dreading being at work 'til midnight.

2. I ate a giant salad for lunch with no cheese, no meat, no egg, no creamy dressing... just vegetables and some kind of vegan balsamic dressing. Not bad, actually.

3. Have you ever tried vegan cheese, let alone looked at it? Uh, yeah, I think that's one substitute I'll be doing without.

But this blog isn't supposed to be about me - it's about Mason. Little Mason, who obviously isn't cleansing and who had a delicious looking hotdog with real cheese and ketchup on a BUN for lunch. It took every ounce of willpower in my body not to grab that thing out of his hand and leave him lunchless.

Only 20 days to go.

Hello Mason, Goodbye Coffee

Being back with Mason these past few days have been amazing. I missed him so much during our five days apart and now that we're together again it's like my patience and energy levels have been completely recharged. Don't get me wrong, there are still tantrums, but I can deal with them so much easier now. This morning, when my angel decide to have a meltdown because I wanted to diaper him, I calmly went out and sat on the couch with my coffee while Mason continued to thrash around on the floor. SEVEN MINUTES (and an entire cup of coffee) later, the screaming stopped. I walked in and asked him if he was finished. He came over, gave me a hug, and let me change his diaper. That was the only tantrum he had today. Cake, right?

Tomorrow, I'm starting a 21 day Quantum Wellness Cleanse. No animal products (meat OR dairy), no processed sugar, no alcohol, no gluten. Oh yeah... no caffeine. Which means.. no coffee. I guess I could try to trick myself with decaf, but mannn... It's gonna be a long 21 days. Cake? Not so much.

Amputee

The day before I left for Michigan, I did a horrible thing - I cut my kid's finger off.

I was trying to get a toy out of the box - some talking stuffed dog that we still haven't opened from Christmas. He wanted it and brought it to me to open. I got out the scissors and there was a split second as I clamped down on one of those zip-ties and Mase's little finger darted in between them when life went in slow motion.

And no, it wasn't a little fingernail cutting incident like I had when Mason was tiny. This wasn't a scratch. I'm telling you, I cut the tip of his finger off. Mason didn't cry, but there was tons of blood. I was upset and in shock and felt horrible, but Mase was a trooper as usual.




When he started to seem a little sad, I put a bandaid on, too. Instant smiles.



Poor baby...

At Least His Feet Won't Get Cold

Mason's always wearing my shoes. He's alway slipping on my sneakers, heels, and boots and clomping around the house in them. But yesterday, after we got out of the shower, Mason put his OWN shoes on. The right feet, too!


I was SO proud!

We'll work on the pants thing some other day...

427 Miles Apart

I'm sitting in Detroit and it's been twenty-four hours since I've seen my baby. Right now I'm kind of frozen on the couch. I woke up forty-five minutes ago, had some cereal, and then sat here trying to remember what I used to do when I had no responsibilities. I still can't remember; guess I'll catch up on my blogging.

God I miss my kid.

Bubbbbblessss!

Bath time has never been so crazy.

Ten Random Friday Facts

about Mason.

1. Newest loves: bubbles (bubble bath, blowing bubbles, saying the word bubble, whatever), trucks, and helping me cook. Newest non-loves: Being told what to do, being told what not to do, wearing a diaper, and eating the first thing I make him for dinner (but he'll inhale whatever the the second thing I make him is).

2. He always always wants me to read to him. He climbs up on my lap with a book and will actually sit there with me until I'm done reading. Just like his mama. :)

3. He learns at least one new word a day; I don't think I could count them all if I tried. He pretty much repeats everything I say.

4. He can say the alphabet up to G - with much prompting.

5. He knows every animal sound known to man... including the elephant and the bunny.

6. When he wants to do something he knows he shouldn't do he shakes his finger back and forth, tells himself "no, no, no", and then does it anyway.

7. He knows exactly what he wants and doesn't want to wait for it. Ever.

8. His favorite toys are kitchen cleaner, bottles of lotion, dryer sheets, etc. Basically anything with a Poison Control warning on the label.

9. Banana. You've gotta hear this kid say "banana".

10. Despite his temper tantrums and his ginormous messes, I still love him more than life.

Wet and Happy

When I have a drink, Mase loves to sip from it, but my glasses are, well, glass. Sometimes I let him walk around with one, but I'm cringing the whole time, bracing myself for disaster.

The other day, I invested in some plastic.

He loves it and doesn't even seem to mind that the front of his shirt is constantly soggy.

Groundhog's Day Antics

Today, Punxsutawney Phil saw his shadow and I realized that parenting has gotten HARD.

Reading back on blog posts of long ago, I remember days where I couldn't eat, sleep, or pee because I couldn't put my baby down without waking him up. I remember finally sitting down to eat a hot meal only to inhale three bites before I had to finish one-handed with a newborn on my boob. I remember becoming obsessed with late night poker tournaments on TV and being able to sleep sitting straight up in bed and the feeling of a hot shower that lasted all of ninety wonderful seconds. I remember the cluster feedings where Mason would eat for five hours at a time and still be starving long after my nipples felt like they were going give up and run away to someone who'd appreciate them. I remember crying in the living room in the middle of the night because I hadn't slept more than an hour at a time in weeks and there was nothing I could do to calm this strange little creature down except stay up longer, holding him.

All that being said, I still think Mason's always been a pretty easy kid; the things I went through with newborn Mason are pretty typical as far as babies go. I hear stories of colic and reflux and hours of hysterical screaming and can't imagine having the strength and the patience to deal with it. While I was merely having the energy sucked out of me by Mason's five-hour nursing sessions, Aimee was losing half her nipple to Madelynn's latch. I've never lost a nipple. I've never even had to deal with my kid having an ear infection. Mason's an non-picky, awesome eater. He shares. He never really cried much and was always content and happy. Even his birth was routine and relatively easy as far as pushing a seven pound baby out of your vagina goes.

But now. Oh man. This is hard. It's hard even to admit it's hard. But it really, really is.

Maybe it all goes back to the lack of napping. Or maybe that's just what I'm blaming it on and I'm doing something majorly wrong. I have no idea. I wish I knew.

Mase and I went shopping with Aimee and Madelynn today. On the way out of Kid 2 Kid, Mason grabbed a bottle of finger paint of the shelf. I took it from him, put it back, and started walking towards the door. I told him to come with me and he just stood there, looking pouty, before he went for the paint again. I went back, picked him up, and carried him out. He was kicking and crying in my arms, so I put him down, thinking maybe he wanted to walk. Nope. The kid turned to Spaghetti Legs right there in the parking lot. He fell on the ground, wouldn't move, and cried. I stood there watching him, waiting for it to be over. He didn't stop. Meanwhile, I'm feeling like everyone and their mother is staring at me like I'm murdering my own child, so I picked him up again and carried him to the car. The second he caught a glimpse of his car seat, Spaghetti Legs turned into Stiff-as-a-Board Boy. I couldn't get him in the seat, let alone buckle the straps. I stood there, trying to ignore him while Mads stared in horror and Aimee laughed from the front seat, until my baby finally calmed down a little - at least enough for me to strap him in. Absurdity. Complete chaos.

So yeah. Parenting is hard and temper tantrums are awful. I would rather have lost a nipple.

Mini-Me

Because he's wearing my hoodie and because the kid's just as goofy as his mama. :)